I sat in my car replaying the situation, beating myself up over this giant missed opportunity! “What was I thinking??? How could I miss that???” Of all the things that I’ve regretted THIS ONE will stick with me, this is one I want to get deep in my psyche to produce a new pattern of behavior later.
I’ve regretted a lot of things in my life, soooo many. To admit mistakes is not weakness, but a springboard for growth. The Holy Spirit has a lifelong interest in your growth, so get over the illusion of perfection and let His loving conviction in. This regret stands out – I saw great financial need – I had in my pocket the ability to bless that person outrageously: a $100 bill. I felt God nudging me to give it, and I didn’t. I don’t know what happened – did my cheapskate side kick in? Was I scared to deal with the reaction? Was there a giant bag of candy I wanted more (that was probably it – ha)?
Obedience was so easy, but now there’s no going back. The moment is gone just like the 57 or so “fun size” Crunch bars I ate yesterday. So I repented. I want that memory to haunt me, I want it to create a marker in my brain so that joyful obedience is my instinct next time. If I could turn back time … well, I can’t … but with the Holy Spirit still tugging on my heart I know that marker in my spirit will have another opportunity to produce obedience. As for the Crunch bars, they might be less forgiving – ahhh.
So take a moment, turn one of your regrets into a marker in you mind for an obedient tomorrow and watch how the Holy Spirit uses it! It’s going to be fun!